In Case You Were Wondering

This is Piper. Someone, we can only assume it was a person under four feet tall, gave this not-yet-two-year-old an open box of Cheerios to look at during breakfast.

I had to use the restroom during our breakfast. Silly me. Why can't I just plan a little better? (And why does every bad/mischievous/injurious/disobedient/dangerous event occur while I am trying to spend two and a half minutes using the restroom anyway?!)

I returned just in time to hear the sound of Cheerios cascading from the box to the table, to the floor, to the tiny space between the table leaf.

Before I could clean up the mayhem, I heard Otto Fox begin to cry. Upon checking out the tiny man I discovered he had peed through his clothes, his blanket and his crib sheet. While I was changing his everything, I started yet another load of laundry.

At some point, I fed Otto, diapered and dressed Piper, supervised the dressing of Bergen, Mosely and London and set the kids to various tasks. I think some other events occurred during the course of the morning - like more using of the bathroom and more general home and offspring maintenance - but I'm not really certain.

Suddenly starving children faces were before me and I discovered that it was indeed the appropriate time for lunch to served. Hmmm. Breakfast was still pretty much lying all over the table (and the floor and that tiny space between the table leaf).

"Could I interest anyone in some Cheerios?" No takers. Truthfully, and to my shame, I simply pushed aside the breakfast mess to make way for the new and improved lunch mess.

I don't even think I know what the afternoon held exactly, but you can probably guess as well as I can. Probably some tears, some poop and hopefully some laughter.

Around 3:30 I finally forced myself to have a rendezvous with the blue-handled broom. Way too many minutes later, every Cheerio was accounted for, the table was scrubbed of its sticky morning mess and the leaf was even removed to reach that tiny space.

Before I could even walk the broom to the closet (and it's only a few steps), my attention was diverted by a baby or a spider or an M&M. Suddenly, because my life feels like I fall in a lot of black holes lately, I was informed again by my apparently starving children that food should be served again soon.

But the kitchen was just clean for the first time that day!! And I also remembered that I needed to drive into town to pick up my weekly veggie/produce delivery from our local co-op.

So you know what I did? I left my kitchen tidy and Cheerio-free, picked up ultra-healthy, locally grown produce and milk and eggs and then circled through the local dining establishment known as McDonald's and let my kids eat their dinner in the Suburban.