07 January 2010

Thanks, Piper

Not too many days ago I was instructing my determined (read: stubborn) youngest daughter. She did not care for my instructions.

I don't actually remember what I was asking the spirited (read: strong willed) two year old to do or to stop doing, but I do distinctly remember her response.

Piper Finnian said, "I don't like you." And she spoke clearly. Very clearly. (She's a pretty good communicator. Maybe a little too good.)

I was really embarrassed. Really embarrassed.

Because I wasn't at my own house. The words were not spoken where only I had the displeasure of hearing. Nope. It never works that way - does it?

At that moment, I desperately wanted to parent based out of my embarrassment.

I wanted my parenting to show everyone watching me what type of mother I am.

That's a recurring theme to me, it seems.

I foolishly want my children's behavior to reveal something about me as their mother.

Right then, I wanted Piper's behavior to reveal that I am a good mom. A put-together mom. A mom in control. A mirage.


My Pride. Revealed. Again.

And actually, the truth is . . . Willow's behavior was reflecting my parenting. And reflecting me. Parenting in an imperfect world. By an imperfect parent.

It was exactly right. Piper's little attitude was reflecting truth.

What I wanted was misleading. A lie. A false representation.

And what I got, from the mouth of my persistent (read: obstinate) little girl, was a reminder that I need much too often.

I have to parent from something far more solid than my feelings. Something far more stable than my emotions.

I need to parent from what is true and right and pure. From what is reliable and secure.

And that isn't me.


  1. Dear Lacey, For a child to tell a parent "I don't like you", or "I hate you", is normal. If the others haven't done it yet, that reflects very well on your parenting!!! For a two-year-old to say "I don't like you" is pretty amazing. It reveals an unusually smart and strong-willed child. When I got back from my last visit, I told Cosette that Piper is the alpha-ruler of the Keigley band. She has the potential to be a GREAT leader. Just train her to use her superpowers for good!

  2. Oh my that Piper! Page has come up with something very good to say to our kids when they say or do something unpleasant, he says, "Eli, when you talk like that or act that way that does not show me that you love me." This in fact causes that little one to boo hoo! So, I have taken this and use it as well. It is inevitable that our children are not going to like us or hate what we do at times, but that does not mean they do not love us. Same with us as parents, do we always like what our children are doing or saying? No, but we still love them. You are a wonderful mommy! And you know what it does not matter what other people think.....it is all about what God thinks! God looks at your heart and He knows your motives. Love you! G

  3. Oh, one more thing! Satan wants us to believe the lie that we are such a great parent....the truth is we fail and we fail miserably. Satan also wants us to believe the lie that so and so has it all together. Which they don't. We are imperfect, imperfect people -- what if we all dared to show our imperfections to all so that no one felt lower than the other. :) Okay, I am writing a novel on your comments. Again! Take care and love ya! G