05 October 2009

Try This

I think I have just discovered a breakthrough diet plan.

Maybe even revolutionary.

It's low cost, convenient and it really works.

(I can prove its effectiveness. I am not a paid actor. This is a true story.)

First, you need a cup of something ridiculously hot.

Steaming, in fact.

Boiling couldn't even hurt.

(Something like, say, your own invention of a vanilla steamer made in your microwave.)

The next step is the most important step.

Place the cup in your hand. Do not blow on the cup's contents. Do not!

Raise the cup to your mouth

And drink a full sip.

(The bigger the gulp, the better.)

There.

Now you have severely burned your tongue.

This should alter your taste buds and subdue your desire to eat for at least a full day.

Perhaps even longer if you are lucky.

Nothing will taste great and everything will be semi-painful to chew, thus causing you to avoid meals you would otherwise rush to devour.

Diet plan enacted!

2 comments:

  1. did that just the other day, but with a bagel bite....and it burt, i mean really burt the top of my mouth and the roof of my mouth actually blistered...gross.....

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  2. Ouch! There is nothing like a tongue burn to make everything you eat absolutely unpalatable for days!! But great dieting idea!! Hmmmmmm . . .

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